All right, I'm going to finish up this week of games, and then NEVER EVER DO IT AGAIN. Just too much space and time, and not enough to interest anybody. However, you can't start something like that and just leave it there, so here's the rest of the slate:
Buccaneers 17, Browns 14
Two teams that seem destined to finish in the bottom 5 or 10 in the league, and with good reason, as we saw.
Fantasy: There's nobody to trust in the Browns passing game, but Mike Williams was highly targeted, got a touchdown grab, and has crazy athletic ability. The quarterbacking is what will hold him back this year.
Jaguars 24, Broncos 17
An upgrade as compared to the above game, but still two teams that are pretty vanilla and aren't going to go very far this season; that being said, the Jaguars looked pretty good and should at least give some teams problems throughout the year.
Fantasy: Mike Sims-Walker puts up a goose-egg on two targets, which has become a trend. This is particularly disturbing because he was being drafted as a top-20 WR, but given that he was wildly inconsistent for most of last year, owners had to know that this sort of risk existed.
Texans 34, Colts 24
Texans use the pound-the-rock strategy to take down the Colts for just the second time in their history, despite being close several times in the last few years. Arian Foster outshines Schaub and Andre Johnson, and shows that zone blocking really is what it's cracked up to be.
Fantasy: Arian Foster was a one-man wrecking crew in the second half, and if he can handle a lead-back workload (a big if), he will easily end up a top-10 running back by year's end. However, there's no way Matt Schaub throws anywhere close to that few passes in future games, so that's probably Foster's ceiling in terms of touches.
Packers 27, Eagles 20
An injury-fest results in Michael Vick nearly leading the Eagles on a 17-point comeback late in the game, only to be undone by his confused identity as a passer or runner. And THIS is why he was only a marginally successful quarterback before the puppy thing.
Fantasy: Kolb did not look very impressive for the time he was in, and even less impressive was the effort by Desean Jackson to get open and make catches. If Kolb doesn't get it together, I could see Jackson finishing out of the top 30 at the position.
Cardinals 17, Rams 13
Two teams that appear to be heading in opposite directions (at least at the quarterback position) locked in a battle of ineffectiveness. Sam Bradford throws 55 passes in his NFL debut! How does Steven Jackson get only 22 carries in a game that was never more than a touchdown out of reach?
Fantasy: Derek Anderson has a better arm than Leinart did, but Fitzgerald netting just 3 catches on 15 targets should really worry owners who took him in the top ten of drafts.
Seahawks 31, 49ers 6
Mike Singletary later thanked the Seahawks for kicking his team around. How about getting your team motivated to play Week 1 against a division rival?
Fantasy: The Seattle backfield looks like a fantasy wasteland (sorry, hopeful Forsett owners), and Michael Crabtree's attitude problems are clearly affecting his performance on the field, and Alex Smith doesn't look good enough to spread the love around. Maybe Coach Singletary will call Crabtree out and he'll score 13 touchdowns like Vernon Davis did.
Redskins 13, Cowboys 7
Alex Barron commits the hold seen 'round the world, and America's team makes like the economy and tanks.
Fantasy: Both defenses are very good, so the general ineffectiveness of both offenses (with the exception of Miles Austin) shouldn't worry anybody. However, Romo's affection for Dez Bryant appears to be quite developed, and he may end up the starting wide receiver even faster than most people not named Roy Williams expected.
Ravens 10, Jets 9
The Jets defense is about as good as its passing game is bad. And the defense is really good; just watch what the Ravens do to everybody else this year. Dustin Keller makes a catch just short of a first down on fourth down with under a minute left, and fails to stick the ball out in front of him to move the chains. I guess that's why the Jets haven't been to a Super Bowl in 40 years.
Fantasy: The Jets barely had the ball, but only gave Shonn Greene 5 carries (and LT 11). As a mid-second-round pick this year, this could be a big red flag for his upside this year; that said, the Ravens run defense is formidable, and LT may have just been the hot hand that night.
Chiefs 21, Chargers 14
Chargers fail to convert multiple times in a goal-to-go situation at the end of the game, and are done in by a wet and carved up field. The Chiefs benefit from two big plays and a surprising defensive performance, but the offense did not look very good.
Fantasy: The Chiefs passing game looks too inconsistent to allow Dwayne Bowe to flourish, while the Chargers passing game may be able to support three passable receiving options (Floyd was the target on the last two goal line attempts of the game, in which he was overthrown on the first and slipped on the second).
And that's Week 1 in the NFL for you!